Sunday, 18th September 2005
Scholastic droolings
I read in this Saturday’s Guardian that the University of Bath is launching an MA in Death and Society. Can you say made for me? I loveseses my dead things and thoughts on dying.
In other related news I just made myself so happy that I got indigestion and wanted to puke up by reading (again) the modules available to me as of the 28th. Fuck I’m so brilliant, fuck I’m so brilliant, fuck I’m so brilliant for applying to this course and getting on! Today I want to do:
Introduction to the Study of Religions (required)
Introduction to Islam
Buddhism: Foundation
Hinduism: Foundation
Messianic Movements in Islamic History
Mysticism in the Great Traditions
Religion and Gender
Sociology of Religions and Cults, Sects and New Religions
Christian-Muslim Relations
Introduction to Jainism
And more, and more, and more…
Friday, 16th September 2005
Aloha Germany!
Statistically speaking, I seem to be undergoing a period of intense popularity. Shame it also seems to be coupled with a period of muteness and verbal boredom. Sorry ducksdelucks.
(Oh, I just killed a moth! I felt a tickle on my forehead and SMASH I have some lovely moth guts on me. Yum!)
Hmm, that reminds me - hi Germany! I’ve only been to visit you the once, when I was 14, on that football exchange trip, and all I remember was that my host family repulsed me because they ate raw meat for breakfast and kept trying to make me eat it. Vegetarian. Veg. E. Tare. E. Anne? Veggie? SAVE THE BABIES??? Save the snorting mud rollers? I love animals when they can still hug and kiss me? I like to frolic in the fields with rabbits and hares and horsies and lizards and moths? Nothing. No comprendo. Every morning was the same apart from the one when they gave me an egg.
Anyway, hi Germany! According to my stats you loveseses yourselves some Tank which is quite handy because the Son of a Bitch said I should move to Germany since I liked reliability and efficiency. I say no, but I am entirely open to a handsome German running away to somewhere hot with me like Spain or Syria or Surbiton.
So, hiya Germsywermsys, do you have to wear two jumpers when you are indoors too? Did you get a summer you can lament the passing of? I didn’t but that is because I moved back to this shithole of an island. Hey, immigrants / foreigners / people that I once was and wish I still were - you’re all mad, unless, that is, you are at risk of being tortured in your homeland, then you are not mad, just stupid for having chosen this bloody country over a nice one like Spain. Or a Greek Island. Or just somewhere generally hot.
But back to you Germans - how do you feel about the concept of arranged marriage minus the marriage bit? I’ve decided that since I have the most abysmal taste in men available to all heterosexual women worldwide, that I might just be a candidate for arranged marriage. Just without the marriage bit. And definitely no kids either. I’m wondering if one of you want to send me a mannie in the post, (with a stamped and addressed return envelope, just in case), because I am thinking that the judgement of a random stranger who knows nothing about me would be infinitely better than my own. Well, think about it anyway. Oh, and you better tell him that I kiss my cats before I kiss him in the morning, evening and afternoon. Just so he knows.
Oh Germbuggers, are you afraid that that crazy right-winger might get into power? I sure am. Oh Germybobermies, why is your language so scary sounding? Oh Germikermy, do you, perchance, happen also to be reading Ralph Ellison’s ‘Invisble Man’ and thinking, “holy crap this is good”? Oh Germsperms, can you at the very least send me some beer or give me a free ticket, room, board and spending money for Oktoberfest? Oh Germdidlums, would you pour some lovely brew into my mouth for me and simultaneously stroke my hair until I passed out and then shove an IV in my best vein and pump me full of water so that I didn’t wake up with a hangover?
You would? I knew it.
*swoons*